When Andrew, one of my "Last of the Summer Wine" friends, told me that Norman Clegg's house was for sale, we knew we had to check it out. So last Saturday, we took a taxi to the new Matter Transport Station in downtown San Diego, and beamed over to the MT Station in Manchester, England. From there, we rented a cute Mini Cooper, and drove out to Holmfirth.
We found Simon, the agent handling the sale, as charming as the town in which he lives. He drove us out to the house, and allowed us to walk through every room, and peer into (nearly) every closet and cupboard. Since the TV series ended in 2010, Norman Clegg has used his royalties to carry out some renovation work, and the house really looks lovely. His garden shows equal attention to detail, and exhibits a delightful quirkiness. We could imagine sitting out there for hours, even in the cold and rain, and gazing at all the points of interest he's created. And when it snowed, or we just needed to warm up, we could go upstairs and gaze out of the third-story windows upon a stunning, hillside vista.
Compo and Foggy no longer live nearby, but I'm sure we would find other laid back folks to hang out with. Each evening, we could also wander down to the White Horse Tavern for a swift half, and take the pulse of local life.
Sadly, after discussing the particulars with Simon back at his office, we realized that purchasing Norman Clegg's former house doesn't make sense right now. First we'd have to petition for an extended stay visa, and the British government doesn't hand those out every day. Plus, even after they build the proposed Matter Transport Station in Holmfirth, there's the fact that England is eight hours ahead of us. So by the time we clocked off work, and could beam over, we'd get there in the wee hours of the morning. And when we woke up to beam back to San Diego, it'd be early evening in England, which means that in the winter, we'd only see the sun on the weekends, and that would mean constantly adjusting our sleep schedules. But, as Simon said, the MT Station won't be built in Holmfirth for a few years, and we couldn't handle driving between Manchester and Holmfirth every day.
Disconsolate, we bade Simon farewell, and wandered down into Holmfirth for a last tour of the town before we drove back to Manchester. We paid our respects to Compo and Nora Batty's houses, then stopped in at Sid's Cafe for some Yorkshire Tea and a sandwich. As we ate, my wife pointed out one final barrier to purchasing Norman Clegg's House, an important factor that we had previously overlooked. There's only one bathroom in his former home, right next to the bedroom. Imagine having to troop up two flights of stairs every time you wanted to...you know, use the facilities.
I felt a little better about the whole situation after she pointed this out. I mean, if you want something bad enough, you'll find a way to work around most of the problems that stand in your way. But then there are others, like this last one, that make the whole situation just plain impossible!
Dragon Dave
Related Dragon Cache entries
Catching a Glimpse of Norman Clegg's House
Related Internet Links
Norman Clegg's House Listing
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