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Tuesday, August 27, 2013

The Giant Rabbit Guardian

Upon entering Sacramento Airport, one is filled with a sense of foreboding.  At first, no suggestion of danger is visible.  But look closer, and you'll see it--a flash of orange, nothing more--and suddenly the Giant Rabbit Guardian is racing toward you.


It crashes down on gleaming, white tile.  It leaps between columns.  It bounds over walkways and escalators.  There is no escape.  For you have entered its home, and now stand in its domain.  You exist only because it allows you to.


Beware those who tell you that Security is lax, that the Sacramento Airport's restrictions can be ignored.  The Giant Rabbit Guardian's senses are a thousand times more sensitive than that of any normal-sized trained animal.  Its brain is infinitely larger than any human's.  It can sense your emotions, read your mind, anticipate your actions.  

You can not possibly outwit it.  


So whatever you do, obey all the rules.  Don't even contemplate breaking them.  For if you do, the Giant Rabbit Guardian of Sacramento Airport will pounce.


"Ha ha," it cries.  "Got you, evildoer!"


"Now throw away that can of soda!  Remember: no liquids over three ounces are allowed through Security!"

Dragon Dave

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