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Friday, August 8, 2014

Why Astronauts Go Heavy On The Sauce

Stan: I hope you've enjoyed this morning's tour of Space Center Houston. 
Rusty: Oh, I have! Now I want to be an astronaut more than ever!
Stan: That's the spirit! I've certainly enjoyed my space missions, and I'm sure you will too, once you become astronauts. So shall we sign you both up for memberships in our program?
Rusty: Absolutely!
Artist: Uh, I guess so.

Stan: Great! While my staff processes the paperwork, let's enjoy a typical astronaut meal in the food court. Astronauts love freeze-dried poultry pieces preserved in seasoned batter, and sections of fried vegetable matter ready for dipping. Not only are they incredibly healthy, but they're also easy and fun to consume in zero gravity.

Rusty: My olfactory senses detect flavor-packed aromas. Why so many sauces, Stan?
Stan: It's an unfortunate fact that the vacuum of space deadens an astronaut's taste buds. 
Artist: Ouch!
Stan: Don't worry: it's not painful, and their appreciation for food returns when they get back to Earth. But while in space, astronauts rely on dipping sauces like ketchup, barbecue sauce, honey-mustard, and Red Hot Breathe-Fire-Like-A-Dragon to enhance the flavors of their food.
Artist: Astronauts already endure rigorous schedules, years of preparations, and long periods away from friends and loved ones. I'm not sure I'd want to go into space if it also lessened my ability to appreciate the nutrients I ingest. 
Stan: Are you sure? Space travel is too cool to miss. 
Rusty: Yeah, and besides, dipping sauces are fun.

Artist: I suppose you're right. What's one more sacrifice, when the rewards could be so great? Okay, sign me up for membership in the space program.

Stan: Congratulations you two! You're now official members of Space Center Houston. That'll be seventy-six bucks apiece.
Rusty: Hey, I thought membership only cost $26 per person!
Stan: Yes, but then you have to add on fifty bucks for "Lunch with an Astronaut."
Artist: Oh nice! And you said dipping sauces were fun!
Rusty: They are!

Artist & Rusty Daleks, and Stan the Cyberman

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