The Dragon's Cache: Achieving Our Christmas Goals

Thursday, December 22, 2011

Achieving Our Christmas Goals

Chris, the Spirit of Christmas Present, has invaded Lauren’s home. He decries her store-wrapped presents and the preprinted Christmas cards she has not even signed. His insistence that he cannot leave her apartment until she tells him her heart’s desire for a Christmas gift complicates her schedule further. She only has four days until Christmas, and still faces innumerable demands. She doesn’t have time to deal with the presence of an unwanted Spirit, no matter how beneficial he believes his actions to be.

Her coworker Fred has agreed to help her exorcise this unwanted Spirit, but so far he’s turned up no definite methods for doing so in his research. She’s tried repeatedly to contact her sister, who accidentally channeled Chris from the Astral Plane, for advice on how to get rid of him, but so far her sister has not answered or returned her calls. Finally, that evening Lauren reaches her on the phone, but her sister doesn’t know how to banish Chris. She doesn’t have time to talk: she and the Maharishi are going off to Barbados to enjoy a harmonic divergence there on Christmas Eve. Lauren tries to watch TV, but finds “It’s a Wonderful Life” on nearly every channel. (Like Fred, she greatly prefers the movie “Miracle on 34^th Street”). Not only did Chris’ presence force her to cancel a date with the dreamy Scott, but also there’s no food in the fridge for supper: Chris has transformed her frozen entrees into bottles of Evian water, and drank all her eggnog.

"Hey Mickey, want some eggnog?"

She wakes to knocking on the front door. She rises from the couch to learn that Fred has brought her breakfast from McDonald’s. They find money on the table: Chris returned her preprinted cards and left her the refunded cash. Fred fills her in on the research he did for her last night, but they’re still no closer to figuring out how to banish Chris. Then she discovers that Chris has turned the beautiful dress she bought to impress Scott at the Christmas Eve party into one made from feathers and dried leaves. Fred offers her suggestions on what to wear instead, and vows to do more research on exorcising unwanted spirits for her. After he leaves, Chris appears. He can’t understand why she doesn’t like her new dress; he sees it as superior in every way. After all, it’s made by the Brazilian Indians, and is completely biodegradable.

If only he would go away and stop complicating her life!

Lauren has worked hard to purchase the perfect gift for everyone on her list. She’s been looking forward to wearing her new dress to the Christmas Eve party at work. Chris’ actions throw her carefully ordered schedule into chaos. Flustered, she gives Fred his Secret Santa gift early, and in person, judging that she might not have time to do so later. She can’t even watch her favorite Christmas movie. When did the holidays become a season to be endured rather than enjoyed?

In the introduction to her collection of Christmas stories, Connie Willis argues passionately why “Miracle on 34^th Street” is a far superior movie to “It’s a Wonderful Life.” I have to wonder: Is Ms. Willis trying to make a point by how Lauren always switches the channel when she finds “It’s a Wonderful Life” on the TV? Each of us has been given a great gift: a life to live out in any manner we choose. Regardless of our social or economic status, surely we should view the holiday as more than targets to meet and jobs to be completed.