Knitted Star Trek Beyond

Dr. McCoy: Why so introspective, Spock?
Mr. Spock: I'm considering leaving Starfleet to devote myself to my fellow Vulcans.
Dr. McCoy: But your Human girlfriend is so hot! Being with Uhura is worth facing any danger.
Mr. Spock: Perhaps you are right, Doctor. I shall reconsider my future plans in light of your opinion.

Ensign Chekov: This sure is a dangerous mission. Look at all the red shirts piling up!
Yeoman Rand: You're right! I don't even know why I'm here! I'm not even officially a part of this new crew! I must be crazy to have come along as an uncredited crew person!

Mr. Scott: Well, you've done it again, sir. That's the second time you've destroyed my beautiful starship in the third installment of a series of movies.
Captain Kirk: I can't help it, Scotty. First it was Nero. Then Khan. Now they face me off against a former starship captain with a grudge against Starfleet. When our filmed Star Trek adventures are limited to battling psychopathic mass-murderers, the destruction of the Enterprise becomes inevitable.
Mr. Scott: Well, I'm canna take it no more, sir. I'm considering handing in my commission, along with Spock.
Captain Kirk: Don't worry, Scotty. The transporter keeps records of everything's original specifications. We can merely create a new ship by accessing Starfleet's records. 
Mr. Scott: I never thought of it that way, Captain. What an ingenious idea!
Captain Kirk: Beam me up a new ship, Mr. Miracle Worker!
Mr. Scott: Aye aye, Captain. I'll get started on it right away.

Uhura: I'm glad you've decided to remain with me in Star Fleet. Now we can look forward to making a child who's only one-quarter Vulcan.
Mr. Spock: Our love may not be logical, but I look forward to a long and prosperous life with you.

Another Year, Another Dinosaur

Pepper: I wonder what Mistress is working on.
Salt: Let's take down her knitting bag and have a look.

Salt: Mistress has been so busy lately. Maybe we should help her as a New Year's Day present.
Pepper: How? We don't know what she's making.
Salt: We're Daleks. We can figure it out if we work together.
Pepper: Oh, all right. I suppose I can help.

Pepper: These are weird shapes.
Salt: Yes, but it's pretty clear these pieces need to be stuffed.

Pepper: Are you sure you're sewing the pieces together correctly?
Salt: If I'm in error, I can always disassemble it and start again.

Salt: Alert! Alert! I've created a monster!
Pepper: Yeah, I'm not so sure he wants to be disassembled.

Pepper: Good, you're conscious again. Meet Alice the Allosaurus. I finished her for you.
Salt: Good, kind Allosaurus. You know I was just kidding about disassembling you, right?
Pepper: Don't forget you called her a monster.
Salt: Uh, I think you can stop helping now.

Salt & Pepper Dalek

Related Dragon Cache entries
When Daleks Knit
Dinosaur Knitting
Another Year, Another Dalek

The Baby Elephant Blanket

Blue: By Davros, what happened here?
Hulk: Hulk smash baby elephant!
Artist: That's not funny, Hulk! Nor is it nice to make fun of others. 

Hulk: Proximity Alert! Danger! Danger! Elephant Attack!
Blue: Relax, Hulk. He looks rather friendly to me. Who is he, Artist?
Artist: He's an elephant blanket Mistress made for a coworker's baby. 
Blue: He's cute! Do you think Mistress will make another for us?
Artist: She's already made us an elephant.
Blue: She has? I've never seen him.
Artist: Yes, you need more practice at spotting elephants, don't you?

Artist: This is pincushion. He's small, so he tends to hide a lot. 
Blue: Hi Pincushion. Let's hang out together. What do you say?
Artist: He doesn't talk much.
Blue: He nodded just then, didn't he? I'm sure I saw him nod.
Hulk: Hulk like Pincushion. My kind of elephant, just the right size for smashing!
Artist: No, Hulk! No! You will not smash Pincushion!

Blue: Farewell, Baby Elephant Blanket! I hope you make your new friend very happy.
Hulk: Hulk glad to see Baby Elephant Blanket go! He's too big to smash properly!
Artist: Hulk, I wish you wouldn't be so mean to people.
Hulk: Hulk not mean. Hulk just having fun. Artist not get Hulk's jokes.
Blue: I should think not. He's a serious artist, after all.

Hulk, Blue, & Artist Daleks

Daleks vs the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog

Pocket: Help me carve this up for Master and Mistress.
Denim: Um…if you insist.

Pocket: What's wrong?
Denim: It's that movie we saw last night. What if a Killer Rabbit seeks revenge on us?
Pocket: The Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog is only Arthurian legend. 
Denim: Are you sure? The way it decimated his troops...
Pocket: Even if it was based on reality, the events in the film occurred in 932 A.D. There's no such thing as Killer Rabbits these days.

Pocket: See, doesn't that look nice? Mistress will enjoy that. 
Denim: Yes, I suppose so.

Pocket: Would you forget about the Killer Rabbit of Caerbannog and carve off a piece for Master's dessert? By Davros, you're worried about something you saw in Monty Python and the Holy Grail! There are no such things as Killer Rabbits!

Pocket, Denim, & ...

The Twitter Choir

"Yes we love, the joys of Spring, and of those we will sing."

"We lift our song, into the air, and let our voices ring."

"Have no fear, Spring is here, tis the Season of Love."

Pinky: Hey you birds, get out of here! I mean it: scram! Didn't you see my sign? No Twitter Choirs Allowed!

K-9: Depart immediately! March! March! March! March!
Pinky: If your Master is always looking for an excuse not to practice, eradicate all such piano bench infestations. Remember, you have to be cruel to be kind. Especially in Spring.

Pinky Dalek, K-9, & The Twitter Choir

The Acupuncture of Mr. Frog

No one enjoys feeling pain.  (Well, okay, most of us don't).  Like it or not, pain is a part of life.  Pain accompanies change, which sometimes we can channel into personal growth and improvement.

Recently, Mr. Frog suffered through a long process of acupuncture. But he's a better frog because of it.  Now he's smart. Dashing. Cool.

He can even look back on the experience and smile.  

You might say that it made him the frog he is today.  

He's even got a new name.  That's right, the frog formerly known as Mr. Frog now goes by the name Prince.  Isn't he regal?

Embrace change.  

Dragon Dave

Dinosaur Knitting

A guest blog by Dragon Dave's wife

While travelling in England last year I came across a book I thought would be fun to own.

Imagine my delight when I received the book as a birthday present.

Wow!!! Look at all those dinosaurs!

After opening the book, and looking at all of the magnificent beasts that I could knit, I went to my yarn stash to see what would be suitable for the chosen project. 

Well, I did find purple and yellow in my yarn stash.

Hear my needles click and clack as my fingers move the yarn over the needles.  Knit, knit, knit and soon a body is nearly finished.

 I think more yarn will be needed to finish the beast.

A little more work and a little more yarn and soon a dinosaur is waiting to be assembled.

So now assembly time has arrived and I do wish the book would give a little more instruction on the placing and securing the parts.

Caution!! Steggy gets a little prickly while being assembled.

Soon the assembling is completed and a handsome dinosaur is ready to meet the world.

Steggy showing off his good side.

Steggy finds some new friends to play with.

Now, which dinosaur shall I knit next?

Dragon Dave's Wife

Red Dalek Builds Lego Star Wars

Blue: What are you doing?
Red: Shh.  It's a surprise for Master?
Blue: How so?
Red: Master got this Star Wars Lego kit as a gift, but he hasn't gotten around to assembling it yet.
Blue: So you dug it out of the closet and decided to build his Lego set for him?
Red: Exactly.
Blue: I see.  You do realize that half the fun of Legos is building something yourself, right?

Red: Fun?  He thinks I'm having fun?  Let's see him figure out how to put this together, following these inadequate directions! 

Blue: Say, looks like it's coming along nicely.  
Red: What do you mean, 'coming along nicely?'  I've been at it for four hours!
Blue: Hey, get some perspective.  It takes NASA years to build a spaceship.  
Red: Yeah, but that's a real...say, what have you got there?
Blue: Oh, just an old hammer I found lying around.  I thought it might help you fit the remaining pieces together, but as you're doing so well, I'll just--
Red: Give it to me!

Thor: I thought I heard someone mention a hammer.  Hand it over, Red.
Red: No way, I'm tired of this project, and I'll finish it if it's the last thing I do.
Thor: No, don't!  You don't know the power--

Thor: --of the hammer. 
Red: Failure!  Failure!  I must exterminate myself!  Failure!  Failure!
Thor: Oh boy.  Talk about a meltdown.

Red: Thanks for talking me round, and helping me reassemble the Lego Star Wars Tie Interceptor and Death Star.
Thor: No problem.  Just remember, as far as Master is concerned, you did it all yourself.
Red: Fine.  If you want me to take all the credit, I'm good with that.

Red (Blue, & Thor) Dalek

Of Daleks & Hammers

Supreme Dalek: I must say, the Master's scales are sounding good.
Pinky: Yes, once I got him past D Major, he's really taking off.  He's mastered A Major, E Major, and he's not even phased by B Major, even though it's got five sharps.
Supreme Dalek: He seems to be getting the hang of Muzio Clementi's Sonatina Op. 36, No. 4 rather quickly, too.
Pinky: Yes, I think it helps that he finds the Rondo section similar to the second part of No. 1.  
Supreme Dalek: You see what a little gentle persuasion can accomplish?  It told you...what was that?
Pinky: I don't know.  It sounded like a terrific impact of some kind.  Say, who's this guy that's coming along?

Supreme Dalek: Excuse me, stranger, but who are you, and are you supposed to be here?
Thor: Well might you call me stranger, for I hail from Asgard, and my father Odin has cast me down to this unknown realm.  
Pinky: Then you're not from around here?
Thor: Aye, sweet pink Dalek, that is correct.  My name is Thor, and I'm certain my half-brother Loki must have something to do with my exile.  If only I could perform some noble deed to reclaim my honor!  Surely then my father--good King Odin--would forget his wrath, and welcome me back to my native realm.
Supreme Dalek: I'm sure we can find a task to which you are best suited.  There's always honor in a job well done.
Thor: Well said, good Dalek, but first I must find what belongs to me.  Have either of you seen my hammer?
Pinky: Well, I haven't seen a hammer per se, but when our Master plays the keys, he's actually using hammers to pound strings.   
Supreme Dalek: He's the source of the music you hear.
Thor: I cannot be hearing aright.  Do you mean to say that your master uses more than one hammer at once?
Pinky: Oh yes.  Through playing his piano, I mean.
Thor: Exactly how many hammers does your great master wield simultaneously?
Pinky: Uh, eighty-eight, I believe.
Thor: I must see this powerful god you serve.  Perhaps he can deliver me from this terrible plight.  Farewell, good Daleks.

Supreme Dalek: Is it just me, or is this place getting weird?
Pinky: I wonder what he's doing Friday night?

Supreme, Pinky & Thor Daleks

Of Daleks and Fish

Salt: Why do you think Master & Mistress took Rex instead of us this time?

Pepper: Didn't you hear him pleading to go?  It was pathetic.

Salt: It's not right.  They know how much we love the fish at Long John Silvers.  They should have taken us.

Pepper: Let's console ourselves with the leftovers before they put them in the fridge.

Salt:  That ice pack certainly kept everything cold.  My olfactory sensors are barely registering.  Still, dibs on the onion rings.

Pepper:  Strange--my motion sensors are registering movement.

Salt:  Quick, open the box!

Salt:  Rex!!!!  What are you doing in there?

Rex: Um...not much.  Why?

Pepper: What happened to all the leftovers?

Rex:  Uh, yeah, about that...

Salt: I don't know; it seems like false advertising.

Pepper: Like I said: pathetic.

Rex: Hey, I said I was sorry!

Salt, Pepper & Rex Dalek

Related Dragon Cache Page

Dalek Digressions